The Atomic Deathray
Un Galleria de la |
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Somebody should look it up to be sure, but I’m fairly certain that a pack of vicious chihuahuas attacking a cop is one of the signs of the Apocalypse. When they get really riled, chichuahuas can strip a man to the bone in less than five minutes. I, for one, welcome our new canine overlords.
Happy Holidays!
Now settle down and allow me to explain. By wishing you a “Happy Holidays,” I was not “declaring war” on Christianity. (A quick perusal of this site will reveal that when I initiate hostilities towards a religion there’s usually no question about my intent.) I was also not making unwarranted assumptions about what particular Brand Name Religion™, if any, you happen to subscribe to.
What I was doing was expressing a hope that whoever you are, you experience a pleasant state of mind during the time of year when many religions and ethnic groups tend to celebrate or commemorate something or other. It was no more an attack on Christianity than “have a nice weekend.”
This is apparently not sufficient for some people, though. It is not enough to merely wish a person well, you must also explicitly exclude them from such wishes should they be of the heathen persuasion. Not to call anyone’s motives into doubt, but here’s a question for you true-believing Christians out there: how do you think Jesus feels about “Merry Christmas” being used as another way to say “Fuck You?”
A few minutes ago I overheard my co-workers discussing Charles Bukowski, and I asked if they’d ever read Ginsberg. They hadn’t heard of him, so I Googled Allen’s Howl and read them a few lines and then they wandered off. It didn’t make much of an impression.
But I looked Howl over some more after they’d gone, and the old crazy crooked syncopated beat dream was still there, as alive as when I first recognized myself in it thirty-five years ago. After a few minutes I had to stop, ashamed at how utterly short I’ve fallen.
Ahh… Savor the moment. Superstition has taken one to the kisser. A federal judge has ruled that so-called “intelligent design” cannot be taught in high-school biology classes. These quotes sum up the morality of the anti-evolution crowd quite nicely:
“We find that the secular purposes claimed by the Board amount to a pretext for the Board’s real purpose, which was to promote religion in the public school classroom,” he wrote in his 139-page opinion.
…
Said the judge: “It is ironic that several of these individuals, who so staunchly and proudly touted their religious convictions in public, would time and again lie to cover their tracks and disguise the real purpose behind the ID Policy.”
Call me a foolish optimist, but we may not be doomed to a rerun of the dark ages after all. Score one for the Good Guys.
