The Dreck the Halls Department:

• Find out what Santa's really like in Santa Agonistes.

• A list of Ten Rarely-Shown Holiday TV Specials.

• The Heartwarming Christmas Quiz.

• Santa discovers an unorthodox solution to his manufacturing problems in Zombies of the North Pole. (This is also the name of a collection of my horrible little short stories.)

Other Stuff:

• You may have noticed the conspicuous lack of graphics on this site. That's because when I started it I was working as a graphic artist and needed a break from pixel-pushing. That's no longer the case. Here, for your viewing pleasure, is a gallery of my artwork. It includes graphics, anaglyph 3D, animation and VRML.

Other Terrible Things I'm Responsible For:

• Do you lie awake at night, fearful of what the morrow will bring? Then read THE FUTURE REVEALED! and put your mind at ease. Or not. Whatever.

• I eat a big, heaping helping of crow in A Few Thoughts On Taste.

• In an awkward situation? Not sure what to do? Just Ask Dr. Dongle. He's an expert!

• Be inspired by my incredible humility at Seventeen Embarrasing Confessions.

• Some evil, malevolent short stories that will undoubtedly destroy civilization and corrupt the soul: Zombies of the North Pole.

• My correspondence in support of an inconvenient scrap of paper called the Constitution can be found at The Curmudgeon Files.

• A list of people I think are cool.

Stuff I'm Not Responsible For:

• We All Owe Him Big-Time Dept.:
  A transcript of the Memorial Service for William H. Gaines, founder of Mad Magazine. He twisted my brain when I was a kid. One of the good guys. Pay your respects to a great American.

• Our best hope for the future: The American Civil Liberties Union. Remember, there are a lot of people out there who believe that what this country really needs is a racist totalitarian theocracy. Some of them are members of Congress. JOIN!